Posterous theme by Cory Watilo

Filed under: Adelina

Got Milk?

One of the biggest changes to our lives since Adelina was born was the dairy-free life style that I had to adopt after we found out at six weeks that Adelina has a milk protein allergy. I say "our" lives because by default my poor husband has had to adopt the dairy-free lifestyle as well. Luckily he's been a good sport about it, and eats as much cheese as possible when he is at work.

Finding out Adelina had a milk protein allergy came after our first trip to the ER... we suspected that Adelina had an allergy but weren't completely sure. I had started to limit my cheese and dairy intake but when we had Adelina's 8 week doctor visit the doctor we met with said it probably wasnt an allergy but an anal fissure... yes the things I have learned since becoming a mom. When she told me that I think I almost jumped for joy, I am pretty sure I went home that afternoon and made myself a grilled cheese sandwich. Not a day or so later Brent and I went out for ice cream, it was sooo good, I wish I had savored it a little more because its been at least 3 months since I had ice cream. Not 24 hours later, Adelina not only had blood in her stool but the poor baby was flat out unhappy. And then the blood in the stool got worse and worse until I was literally freaking out. We called the doctor on call and he sent us to the ER, at the young of an age its best to be safe than sorry. Thus at ten o'clock on a week night we were on our way to the ER. We ended up being there about two and a half to three hours and the doctor said that she definitely had a milk protein allergy and to consider other dairy items I had been eating... butter... cream... etc. I hadn't even thought about butter... DUH! Being lactose intolerant myself it probably wasn't a bad idea to give up dairy, but WOW do I miss cheese every so often!

From that day on, I really made a big effort to cut out almost all dairy with the exception of dairy in breads, etc. I suppose this is when the anal mom-zilla of me comes in handy because I am uber aware of anything and everything with dairy, probably to a fault, but if it ensures that Adelina is healthy and well that's all that really matters. I can definitely tell when something has more dairy in it than other things though... i.e. honey nut cheerios have more milk in them than you would think! It's been difficult because truthfully you never realize how many items have milk in them and its hard to find some items without it. I have learned to deal and I tend to fall back on a good 'ol peanut butter and jelly sandwhich when I can't figure out anything else to eat. Boring, yes, but it works! I tweeted to Whole Foods Market one day and asked them what non-dairy snack options they had and they were nice enough to respond with some options for me (Kind Snacks). I also found some non-dairy recipes that I will share in other posts from Whole Foods. And after walking up the aisles of Whole Foods enough times I've also found that there is such a thing as dairy free ice cream AND its not so bad!

It's funny to me now that I gave up dairy at all. One because I love cheese (I mean I worked at a cheese/ice cream shop in high school for crying out loud) and two because lets be honest, I am a bit self-ish. Because of this I wondered when I became pregnant how I would handle putting someone else's needs in front of mine. I kinda thought that I would struggle with it, but it's probably the exact opposite, I am pretty sure (and hubs will probably agree) that I put Adelina's needs in front of mine before anything else. Everyone always tells you how much you will love them when they arrive and how different your life will be but really nothing can prepare you for how little your needs mean and how important everything related to them becomes! Truthfully I love the change motherhood has brought me thus far and while I still need to learn to make more time for myself and for hubs and I to have time to ourselves, its work in progress and I am learning as I go!

Strike three and you're out

As Adelina approaches six months old we have officially decided to switch her to a different day care. We have had numerous experiences at our current center and truthfully most of them have been negative. I know now it shouldn't have taken us this long to come to the conclusion but it's a hard decision to disrupt your child again when the initial change was so challenging.

Strike one really came within the first week. We (or should I say, I) started off almost immediately on the wrong foot with the day care I will refer to as "the center." Leaving Adelina wasn't so bad that first day and week because they truly looked like they cared and wanted to love on her, but within a few days I was already irritated with them. "The center" staff asked for all of the typical items... enough milk for what she typically took during the time she was at day care, a feel for her typical day (naps, etc), diapers, wipes, and anything else that would make her comfortable. Within the first two days they were already asking for more milk... for those of you aren't moms yet and those who didn't breastfeed, breastfed babies should only take in a certain amount of milk a day and at the time I thought I had it figured out as to how much she would need based on 3-4 feedings and what I produced during the day. I had done a lot of reading about what to expect out of day cares in general and what things to keep an eye out for. One of the big ones was overfeeding, if babies are over full they will sleep more and thus need less attention. This is what I saw happening within a few days... or at least what I felt was happening. Now I probably wouldn't have had as much of a problem with the "overfeeding" if they just would have asked instead of immediately feeding Adelina anything and everything we had brought but they didn't ask they just told me. I had a tense conversation on day two about what I expected, and we went back and forth before coming to a middle ground on the amount she was to be drinking. To this day I don't think they agree with me and they make references to it on a regular basis to hubs and not me. (yes, I find this irritating too)

Strike two came about 6-8 weeks into being there. Both hubs and I leave at 4 o'clock on alternating days to pick up Adelina by 4:30 at the latest. I had left work on one such day and arrived at the day care. Being a smaller center, it is one that you have to knock on the door in order to be allowed in (provided the door is locked, otherwise you can just walk in). Well I knocked on the door and could hear Adelina crying on the other side of the door. I sat outside the day care for what felt like ten minutes (frantically knocking, looking in windows, knowing more, etc) before someone came and opened the door and let me in. It was probably the most excruciating ten minutes of my life, knowing that she was crying on the other side, not seeing anyone in the room, and not being able to get to her. Supposedly she was just "fussing" but I know a cry when I hear one and I was NOT happy. I practically left that day in tears myself being so irritated and upset about it. I wasn't really comfortable with the daycare from that day on. I knew in my heart something had to change before I would feel good about leaving Adelina, but at the same time wasnt really sure what we could do or find knowing full and well that most places we had looked at had a six month to one year wait.

Another big negative for both hubs and I was the security issue. For some reason it wasn't something we had spent a lot of time thinking about prior to having Adelina but after having her and taking her to this center we realized what an issue it really was. The center is two houses that were combined in a neighborhood. So in order to get into the infant room you enter through what would be the front door. The door is supposed to be locked on a regular basis and you have to sign in when you walk into the room. The issue is that on many occasions the door wasn't locked and literally anyone could walk in off the street and grab a baby. It was a major worry for us on a regular basis and in my opinion not something we should really have to think about.

For me, strike three came after hubs went to pick up Adelina one day and the infant room supervisor's husband was there holding Adelina. Now I fully realize that he probably just stopped by to say hello and was probably just helping out BUT I was not in any way shape or form comfortable with some random man that I had never met and wasn't (in my opinion) qualified to be holding my child. I was again upset and so irritated. It would have maybe been different if we had met him before and had the chance to get comfortable with him but this is a day care center not an in home day care, they are two completely different things. I came home that night knowing that we really had to figure something else out. 

For hubs, I think strike three came after a friend had a bad experience at the center. We had referred her and her son thinking it would be nice for Adelina to have a friend and neighbor at the same center. While she was there dropping off her first check, a little girl literally fell out of a high chair and took a major spill on the floor. When I say took a spill I mean she essentially went head first onto the floor because she wasnt strapped in and no one was watching her. Talk about mortified... The gal we referred ran out of the center with her son in tow, never to be seen again. I not only felt awful for referring her but if it wasn't crystal clear before, it was now, we had to find something different as soon as possible.

 It took longer than either of us had hoped but we finally found our new center (we had put ourselves on the wait list when we had done our initial search early in the year) and are so excited about the change. Security is a world of difference, cleanliness is amazing and the center employees seem awesome. They truly seem interested in the development of the children and spending time with them versus putting them in a swing or bouncer to keep them entertained.

It's still a couple weeks away before we can start but it's a light at the end of the tunnel and couldn't come at a more perfect time for Adelina's development since she will be sitting up and be able to interact more with the other babies and day care personnel. We look forward to the change and hopefully feeling like the weight will lift just a little off our shoulders and our hearts.

balancing...

Is there such thing as balance when you have an infant at home? To say that we have had sleepless nights is probably an understatement. And to say its been tough balancing work, wanting to spend time with Adelina and time as a couple is probably a major understatement as well. I suppose a part of me thought "balancing" would be easy... ha!

The first few weeks at work were tough for many reasons but I figured once we got through the "transition" it would become second nature and we all would fall right into a routine of wakeups, work, home and sleep. I laugh now because as someone said to me just a few days ago... just when you think you have your kids figured out something else changes. It's SO TRUE!

Now, two months back into work its still a struggle on a daily basis. The mornings are always interesting because Adelina still isn't into a morning wake up routine, it seems to be either a super early wake up (like 4 or 5am) OR we have to wake her up to get her going... it would be nice if there was some sort of middle ground but oh well. I have to admit that while mornings are always interesting with trying to figure out how we are all going to get ready and get out of the house, its also one of our favorite times of day. The minute Adelina starts to wake up both Brent and I rush to get into her room first *yes we race*. She will look left and right until she focuses in on us and then we get the most beautiful smile from her, she gets so excited to see us in the morning... it literally brings tears to my eyes writing about it. Typically its one of her happiest times of the day and that means more smiles, a few giggles and these days more and more sounds!

The day times (during the work week) typically fly by and yet half the time I feel like I never get enough accomplished and there aren't enough hours in the work day. Whether thats because I suck at time management these days, I am day dreaming or maybe I am just that busy I am not sure. Regardless after we get Adelina down for the day I have been logging on to get more work done on a relatively regular basis. Which means, of course, that I get less and less time with my hubby. Luckily I think he understands but it puts me in a situation where I really need to work on my time management skills because I swear I never brought work home as much as I do now. In addition the last thing I want is for my team to think I am not putting in the same effort as before because when push comes to shove I want to continue to grow my career and move forward within the company. I suppose I need to realize that I can't do everything but I truly do feel like there is some improvement that can happen on my part during the work day. So, thats my big to do for the next few weeks... focus, work hard, and then come home without work so I can enjoy my family. I'll let you all know how that goes!

a new way to document our lives

As a "push" present/ anniversary present hubs went out and splurged on a new nikon camera for me. Its been a 'want' of mine for some time... I've had two friends get one within the last year and one specifically took these fabulous maternity photos of us (thanks Whit!). 

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So based on those awesome photos I knew what great pictures a 'real' camera would take.  Hopefully within the next few months I will be taking a class and improving my skills but for now you have to deal with my amateur shots. Here are our attempts at our first photos of Adelina... she is already growing soo fast!

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